“Any Objections, Lady?” “Uh…yeah…A LOT!”

I’m sorry folks, but if you think I’m going to give Other M a good score, stop reading…right…now.

I honestly do not know what to call Metroid: Other M. It’s not so much as the story that is confusing, it’s the darn content of the game itself. Am I running through a doll house, or does a ship this size really have climatic atmosphere? Is this supposed to be either a dumbed-down version of Metroid Prime or a Prime game that was supposed to be scrapped in the first place? Or is this supposed to be Metroid Prime in third-person with a few alterations? “Oh no, it’s actually supposed to represent the old school side-scrolling genre!” Well, if it is, there’s hardly any content that shows/proves it is. I may be a newcomer Metroid-fan, but I know a mediocre game when I play it, not so much as “seeing” it.

Story 6/10:

I love sci-fi, mystery, and conspiracy stories. Best of all, I love it when all those genres are blended so well together. Other M does that…fairly. If it weren’t for the overly long drawling dialogues and monologues, specifically coming from Samus herself when she bluntly points out the obvious, I would have given this portion a better score. Sadly, I almost fell asleep and my mind wondered away during “important”, with the emphasis on the quotes, parts of the story. There are times where the story is decent to make me stay awake, and how the voice acting of Samus is done right. There is one character in particular I like, and the very last scene before the credits roll is very good.

About the story and characters being sexist and all. You would need to know/learn the basics and views of a feminist in order to understand where these “sexist” comments are coming from. (Btw, I’m no feminist and I’m certainly not a girl, lol.) After taking Sociology 222 where I learned about the above, I certainly noticed where in the game these comments came from and it’s understandable for someone to address this, but to keep it as one of the main focuses of a game is not a review at all. It’s not so much as focusing on the game itself, it’s focusing on the story, which is only an optional thing for developers to put into a game. Also, did anyone ever consider that the creators of DOA made this? After hearing about that, I knew there was going to be a sudden uneasiness about the partnership between Team Ninja and the Big N.

But anyway, to get back on track…

Graphics 4/10:

Shiny cut-scenes and levels made by Team Ninja are all the more reason why that partnership uneasiness is there. While they may look good, uninteresting level designs such as a snow or lava place in a spaceship do not make sense at all. Also, for some reason when battling certain enemies, the game would slow-down, not in terms of frame-rate (which I noticed only once), but in terms of game-play. I don’t know why they would happen, but anytime when I go to FPV (First-Person-View) time would slow-down in the game. Was it an actual part of the game or a continuous glitch? Collision detection is an issue as well as every time when I died and ZSS would appear, part of her leg would be dipped into the “floor” of the level. Also, a single hit from something as small as a plant would ridicule my plan to super-jump off the ground after a dash attempt.

Sound 5/10: Like I said, the voice acting of Samus has its moments, but utterly falls into monotonic robot diary writing. I wanted to turn off the game so bad. The other characters are just fine for some reason. Sound effects of this game I somehow don’t like. They’re just not Metroid-ish to me. Music is 90% awesome.

Controls 3/10:

Truly awful. There are simplistic controls, there are bad controls, but combined? Unacceptable. Sure, when you’re not fighting boss battles they work like a charm, but when you’re fighting swarms of small enemies in a small cramped area the chance is 50/50. They are also overly sensitive as converting from 3rd person to 1st person view is often a fight between the perspectives themselves. And while both perspectives are arguing against each other, Samus is standing there with her monotonic voice going, “Am I going to move anytime soon? Cause there’s a big giant worm heading right for me.” (Exaggeration here as she doesn’t actually do/say that, but somehow other characters actually do that when you’re running around trying to figure out what the heck to do.) But don’t worry, Sense Move is your savior…not. Sense Move hardly works with Bosses and swarms of enemies. 1st person view is just a dumbed-down version of the Prime Trilogy…and I honestly hated having to hold the B-button down just to look around. Why can’t I just turn with the WiiMote instead like Prime?

Game-play 1-2/10:

I haven’t played the old Metroid games (don’t judge me, lol), but if the emphasis of Other M to bring back old-school 2D scrolling, then why the heck was this made in a 3D environment? It doesn’t work. No, it doesn’t. Level design is so puny and small, that I really thought I was just playing a virtual version of action figures or doll houses of the 90s. (Hot-wheels, anyone?) This makes boss battles more troublesome than they’re supposed to be in a bad way as they are too fast and random, especially with lousy controls. Take for example Ridley: You would expect the same attack pattern over-and-over again right? Wrong. Once you die, as soon as you’re back in action, he’ll do something totally different. Now, you might be thinking, “Well, it’s supposed to feel challenging, like hardcore, man!” Hello, this is only NORMAL MODE and there are only 2 modes to this game, and no, Easy or Veteran is not one of them! In fact, the content is almost non-existent in this game. There’s no control customization, no pause menu unless you count the map as being one, no unlockables except for a cut-scene Theater Mode (whoopee), and only 2 options in the Options Menu: Language and Subtitles. There’s not even a way to go back to the title screen once you save. Power-ups are a joke and pointless. If you have the ability to regenerate missiles you’ve lost, what’s the point of having Missile Packs? Other Power-Ups such as Charge Packs feel completely useless as you don’t seem to notice any change in speed-charge or “Concentrating”. At least she has all her powers in this game and you don’t have to somehow retrieve the same power again in another game (like Screw Attack in Prime 2 to Prime 3). The camera is frustrating because it swings around so much that and so far away it’s really hard to judge the distance between you and the enemy, which then chain-reacts to the beginning of this section with levels and bosses. Oh, did I mention how I oh-so hate it when Nintendo games like this have enemies that respawn every time you go back to the same room?

Overall 1-5/10:

Because this was supposed to be a 2D game to bring 2D Metroid back, I didn’t expect this to have any Prime elements in it at all, nor did I expect the same amount of detail like the Prime games but something close to them, but I never expected a 2D game like this to play so badly and feel so broken and out-of-place. The story was the first thing to draw me in, the second was wanting the experience of 2D Metroid in a 3D style but still playing in 2D like New Super Mario Brothers Wii and neither of these fulfilled my gaming desire which is very sad for a newcomer Metroid fan. If you suggest for me to play the older 2D ones to experience them, I have no desire at all to play them. Not because of what Other M suggests about its overall 2D games, about what they should be, would be, or have been, but because they simply don’t grab me at all.

So then this begs the question: Is this a “real” Metroid game/title or not? Do I consider this a “real” Metroid game/title? Well, I haven’t played the old-school games, have no desire to play them, and have only played the Prime games so I don’t know what a “real” Metroid game should be, could have been, or is. Only “true” players who’ve played all the Metroid games would be able to determine that.

But what I can tell you is that maybe this should’ve been the Metroid movie that Uwe Ball oh-so gladly wanted to make because that’s exactly what I think Other M is: a doll house edition popcorn mini-movie. If it were that instead I'd give it a B to B+